Electoral College vs. Popular Vote...

i sat and ate a bowl of cereal and watched the coverage regarding this important but slightly confusing issue... it was important five years ago today as there was some confusion as to who exactly was elected the next President of these United States...

i went and took a shower... while in the shower my ex-husband came in the bathroom and asked how i was feeling ~ my response was i'm sick to my stomach terrifed ~ more so than with Jordan he asked... oh no not about the baby... this election thing is freaking me out... only you would be concerned with that more than being induced to have your son he said

i don't know how true that was but i was more concerned that morning with who would take over the leadership of our nation than i was about bringing my son into this world ~ i knew that no matter what there would just be more love in my life

and so we went to the hospital and at 8am they hooked up the iv and almost 11 hours later my beloved baby boy was placed on my chest for about a second then rushed off to the nursery as he wasn't breathing properly and there was some concern about his heart...

you spend nine months doing everything they tell you ~ you give up your body to this little being... making sure that only good, healthy things go into it... rest all that you can... regular check ups and reassurances that all is progessing as it should and then in less than an instant you are given the worst possible news and you slowly feel your own heart start to break...

fortunately it was just a minor issue that time and oxygen healed... although it's why i am much more careful with him now that i ever was with his sister and why i have nightmares of him passing out on the soccer field or basketball court and leaving me ~ irrational i'm sure but the fear was placed in me that morning

so Happy Birthday to my baby boy ~ i'm blessed to be your mom and to be loved by you

Beautiful Baby Boy ~ Yoko Ono and John Lennon

'out on the ocean, sailing away,
i can hardly wait to see you come of age
but I guess we'll both just have to be patient.
'cause it's a long way to go,
a hard row to hoe,
yes, it's a long way to go but in the meantime.

before you cross the street, take my hand,
life is what happens to you
while you're busy making other plans

beautiful... beautiful... beautiful... beautiful boy'