a gift to you all from me...

http://www.potsc.com

People of the Second Chance... they've got it figure out!!!

i forgot for a minute...

Lyrics | Rob Thomas - Little Wonders lyrics

GREATNESS!!!

so I'm NOT a fan of Christmas...

for SOOOO many reasons... mostly its just too much drama and more than not have forgot (if they ever knew) what its supposed to be about.

so having said THAT... CHRISTMAS for REAL... happened already for me this year.

I have four girls that work on my team. One of my girls is African... and her Mom lives in Sudan, Africa. She was coming to Dallas for Christmas for the first time in many years. The excitment spilled over to me and I was very excited to meet her and tell her how wonderful her daughter is and what an asset to my team she truly is.

WELL... once again SNOW messed up my world... LOL (comedic relief from a heavy post)

So they were able to land in Newark last Friday as the other airports were not accepting flights.

We were supposed to all go to lunch on Monday... this is when I got the news that she came to the US from Africa and was stuck in NJ... ok... or hell well not that bad but you get my point.

I looked up Amtrak... I looked up Greyhound... NO LUCK... but I call a colleague and well short story already toooooo long... she was able to get on a flight that arrived last evening and I saw smiles that are museum picture worthy today.

My friends... I PROMISE YOU... there isn't anything that anyone could put a bow on that would equal that feeling.

My Christmas Wish for Everyone... is that you are able to experience whatever makes your heart happy!!! If you read this... I probably LOVE YOU a lot!!!!

Joyeux Noel

Paula Deen how i love thee...

I don't know if I've ever mentioned that I have a love affair with Paula Deen. Completely platonic... nothing kinky here but I just think she oozes warmth and love.

So I decided about a year or so ago, that I want to celebrate the end of this decade or beginning of my next depending on how you interpret it by visiting Savannah, a town I've always been intrigued by... have you seen Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil... well HIGHLY recommend it... ok sorry ADD you know!

ANYWAY today... i found this ... needless to say I have been out of my mind over the moon... and I don't turn 40 for 2 years!!!!!

You all are invited to come with... I want everyone that I love that can to join in the festivities... there is a link that shows other cottages 'cause well we all can't stay at Paula's place LOL.

What is it they say...

The way to a man's heart is through his stomach or something like that.

Well the way to mine... is to embrace my kids. I've had the opportunity on a few different occasions lately to spend time with my friends and my kids. It's so very different from when I was growing up... you know in the age of children are seen and not heard. I love watching my kids interact with my friends and I especially love it if one of my friends sends me a text or email with info that they know my children will love.

I was in a craptastic mood this week... I'm mostly tired of the struggle. Never enough time... never enough money... spending too much of me on things that don't deserve me... y'all know the drill.

Well this morning a friend was excited to share with me something that Jordan would like and everything was put back into perspective. I was reminded of why my life is good and of the ones that truly make me smile and feel loved.

SO... thank you for that!!

Letter from Jesus about Christmas --

It has come to my attention that many of you are upset that folks are taking My name out of the season.

How I personally feel about this celebration can probably be most easily understood by those of you who have been blessed with children of your own. I don't care what you call the day. If you want to celebrate My birth, just GET ALONG AND LOVE ONE ANOTHER.

Now, having said that let Me go on. If it bothers you that the town in which you live doesn't allow a scene depicting My birth, then just get rid of a couple of Santas and snowmen and put in a small Nativity scene on your own front lawn If all My followers did that there wouldn't be any need for such a scene on the town square because there would be many of them all around town.

Stop worrying about the fact that people are calling the tree a holiday tree, instead of a Christmas tree. It was I who made all trees. You can remember Me anytime you see any tree. Decorate a grape vine if you wish: I actually spoke of that one in a teaching, explaining who I am in relation to you and what each of our tasks were. If you have forgotten that one, look up John 15: 1 - 8.

If you want to give Me a present in remembrance of My birth here is my wish list. Choose something from it:

1. Instead of writing protest letters objecting to the way My birthday is being celebrated, write letters of love and hope to soldiers away from home. They are terribly afraid and lonely this time of year. I know, they tell Me all the time.

2. Visit someone in a nursing home. You don't have to know them personally.. They just need to know that someone cares about them.

3. Instead of writing the President complaining about the wording on the cards his staff sent out this year, why don't you write and tell him that you'll be praying for him and his family this year. Then follow up... It will be nice hearing from you again.

4. Instead of giving your children a lot of gifts you can't afford and
they don't need, spend time with them. Tell them the story of My birth, and why I came to live with you down here. Hold them in your arms and remind them that I love them.

5 Pick someone that has hurt you in the past and forgive him or her.

6. Did you know that someone in your town will attempt to take their own life this season because they feel so alone and hopeless? Since you don't know who that person is, try giving everyone you meet a warm smile; it could make the difference.

7. Instead of nit picking about what the retailer in your town calls the holiday, be patient with the people who work there.. Give them a warm smile and a kind word. Even if they aren't allowed to wish you a "Merry Christmas" that doesn't keep you from wishing them one. Then stop shopping there on Sunday. If the store didn't make so much money on that day they'd close and let their employees spend the day at home with their families

8. If you really want to make a difference, support a missionary-- especially one who takes My love and Good News to those who have never heard My name.

9. Here's a good one. There are individuals and whole families in your town who not only will have no "Christmas" tree, but neither will they have any presents to give or receive. If you don't know them, buy some food and a few gifts and give them to the Salvation Army or some other charity which believes in Me and they will make the delivery for you.

10. Finally, if you want to make a statement about your belief in and loyalty to Me, then behave like a Christian. Don't do things in secret that you wouldn't do in My presence. Let people know by your actions that you are one of mine.

Don't forget; I am God and can take care of Myself. Just love Me and do what I have told you to do. I'll take care of all the rest. Check out the list above and get to work; time is short. I'll help you, but the ball is now in your court. And do have a most blessed Christmas with all those whom you love and remember :

I LOVE YOU,
JESUS

Rewind...

We were at dinner… at an Italian restaurant that was only open for about a week… the food suk’d but it was close to where we were living at the time. Jordan was 18mos old and just starting to use words…and her favorite word was puppy and EVERYTHING was a puppy. Now is this the best reason to go get yourself a dog… so that your 18 mos old child might actually use the term appropriately, probably not but that is what we did. As spur of the moment as that… we always knew we wanted a German Shepherd… both her dad and myself grew up around them (my mom’s parents ALWAYS had one!)

She was four months old… and I remember sitting on the floor playing with her and saying to her… are you ever just going to lie down and chill. That was yesterday right?? That’s how it feels for SURE.

That was 12 years ago… we were in California… we have been back and forth across the country 3 times… no 4. She has flown 3 times… she has ridden ever so patiently in the car for days on end. She helped raise Jordan and Jake… never once did she growl or snap or did I worry about her in their presence EVER. She never met a stranger but if you were coming into her space she certainly let her presence known. She took care of me when I was sad… I took care of her through thunderstorms…

I’m not sure that I have the strength to do what I have to… I keep looking around me at everyone going about their day like it’s a regular day… and even worse its Friday so everyone is all ready for their weekend and the fun to be had. I just want to scream WAIT… STOP don’t you know my world is about to never be the same and I’m scared and how do I walk into my apartment with her not there and how do I dry the tears from the blue and brown eyes and help them see it will be ok… when I don’t know what ok means now.

I know its for the best… I know tomorrow we will start down the new path… but really if I could rewind for another 12 years… well I’d prefer that

for my Kailey...

Poem for Dog Lovers

Hello. I've been expecting you for quite some time.
Here, come sit beside us for awhile .
and let me tell you about this old friend of mine.
She might look tattered or maybe old
But I won't say goodbye until you've been told.
She had the brightest eyes I had ever seen,
And wore a beautiful fur coat that would out shine a queen .
She was never prissy but walked with an aire ......
And oh so polite, you could take her most anywhere.
She could run like the wind and could catch anything she chased
But she protected and sat with me when I had problems to face.
You could not find a friend nearly so dear.
Because no matter the trouble she always stayed near...
She has never asked for much from me;
Just to love and respect her and I think you'll agree .
To give her a good meal plus a nice warm bed is not much to ask ;
When she has given me all her love and to her this was no task.
Now I understand you have a schedule to keep.
But I have a small favor before she nods off to sleep.
Please fold your wings around her and let her feel young while in no pain ;
Dear Guardian Angel of Pets ,
please keep her safe and happy until I see her again.

Ginger Patton

my wish for you all...

May your tears come from laughing

You find friends worth having

With every year passing

They mean more than gold

May you win and stay humble

Smile more than grumble

And know when you stumble

You're never alone




Never Alone - Music Video

fresh film+design | MySpace Video">

Almost Famous is my Favorite Movie...

and unlike music that answer doesn't change.... my favorite line in Almost Famous is

'They don't even know what it is to be a fan. Y'know? To truly love some silly little piece of music, or some band, so much that it hurts.'

I was on my elliptical this morning and Rob Thomas Live At The Red Rocks was assisting in my work out... he does If You're Gone acoustically during this performance. As I was listening to that i realized I miss the horns during the acoustic version...

Now I'm a lyrics girl... pretty much that's what gets me, the music and melody is secondary... the lyrics are what make me fall in love with a song PERIOD. However... there are a few songs that for whatever reason... something else stands out... so if you are so inclined... what about you? Are there certain songs that if the bass line or fiddle were missing ~ you would feel like you had Thanksgiving without the mashed potatoes??

These are the ones that come to mind right off for me...

1. If You're Gone by Matchbox 20... the horns
2. Crush by Dave Matthews Band... the bass line in that song... is as my favorite GUY would say Money
3. Eden's Gate by Pat Green... the fiddle... The Fiddle... THE FIDDLE *swoon*
4. Vincent Black Lightening by Reckless Kelly... the lead guitar in this song just makes me want to dance ~ and I don't dance except with Jake in convenience stores to goofy songs!

I. LOVE. THIS.

The Cocoa Butter one... its FABULOUS... it smells heavenly and it leaves my skin so soft.

Which means they will stop selling it in about a month!

favorite...

if you haven't checked out Kings of Leon yet... please do and while the new album is great ~ don't be afraid to check out this older stuff 'cause it's GREATNESS too.

Wyoming and Idaho

So i've been trying to write about my trip since I got back and I'm not sure yet that I have the right words to articulate everything... but I'm going to try. First of all ~ it was GORGEOUS... but here decide for yourself...







the last night we stayed in this very quaint little cabin... which WHEN I take the kids is where we will stay for the duration because it was absolutely charming...

and WHEN I take my children... we WILL do this because it was THE. MOST. FUN. EVER.

There were Brauns... lots of Brauns... walking around like they are just regular people... holding the door open and talking to me like they could see me or something... apparently they didn't get the memo.

It was cold but I didn't mind it... there was hail... it makes us giggle thinking about it... did I mention that it was gorgeous I'm pretty sure we drove straight through God's heart between Challis and Salmon!

My most favorite memory of my vacation... friday night... walking into the hotel room and the face of Deidre smiling big as day because I made it back to the room just as the Creed Concert was about to play on vh1... Perfect!

twice in one day...

I've been called the mean one. I'm not sure that I don't love this. I've been the 'nice' one for so long now I believe that some may have taken that to mean I wasn't so much a force to be reckoned with as much as one to be walked on and taken advantage of... let me assure you friends while I may get down from time to time do not mistake me for being 'out'... I've cleaned out my closet lately and I'm really happy with what has been tossed and most certainly happy for what remains both the old standards that I've relied on more than anyone should ever have too... and the recent additions.

I'm sincerely blessed...

and now i lay him down to sleep

'It's what I dream of every night mama, to be a famous and loving Rock Star.' ~ Jake to me last night as I was tucking him in to bed... 'cause Rock Stars are known to be 'loving' bwahahahahaha

gone too soon...

she cared for my young ones... and now she is in the care of OUR FATHER... i'm off to say a final good bye to this beautiful young lady who has left us far too soon.

a face lift...

i thought it might inspire... so here are a few things for y'all

* i twitter now... which means Travis Barker, Chris Daughtry and Shaq are now amongst my nearest and dearest

* i went to Wyoming and Idaho... i learned i'm NOT cool enough lol BUT it was a FABULOUS lesson to learn

* when i grow up i want to be a river guide

* i finally 'get' Jack Ingram

* i am considering sending the 13 year old back... i'm trying to find the receipt

* apparently my calling in life might be something like that of the dude from The Cleaner... i'm not sure it's what i want so when that 'call' comes in can you just ignore it... that's what i do if someone calls on my blackberry and i don't feel like talking

* $15 for Creed AND Staind... deal of the DECADE!

* i'm late for this party but i'm in LOVE with the Pioneer woman and her WHOLE family... but if they don't invite us for Thanksgiving i have a MOST acceptable back up plan

* the only good thing about the next six months is Thanksgiving by the way... its fall ~ NOT. A. FAN.

* i still love Tim McGraw and i'm not going to apologize for that... i only listen to The Dancehall Doctor's and previous albums however

'til next time... love Love LOVE

Gem's from Jake

ok i considered starting a whole new blog... but decided i'll just add them here mostly because i don't want to forget them and later when i say you were a hoot back in the day... and he asks like what do you mean... i can show him!

so we were listening to Barefoot and Crazy on Sunday... he looks at me...

'Meet me at the bottom with a cool whip kiss... well that's weird!'

'No baby... it's cool WET kiss'

'oh...' he thinks for a minute... 'That would be tasty though wouldn't it?'

we got home from the day yesterday and i pull into our parking spot... Jake opens his door to get out of the car and he says to me 'Come on movie star... your stage awaits.' BWAHAHAHAHAHA

so from now on every now and again... i'll bring you some more Gem's from my Jake!

he believes in me too much...

i'm pretty sure of it because that whole he doesn't give you more than you can handle... well lately i'm not handling any of it all very well.

i keep coming here and attempting to write about things but even that feels heavy... a lot will be decided this week... please my friends keep us in your prayers

"We Had Him"

Beloveds, now we know that we know nothing.
Now that our bright and shining star can slip away from our finger tips like a puff of summer wind.
Without notice, our dear love can escape our doding embrace.
Sing our songs among the stars and walk our dances across the face of the moon.
In the instance we learn that Michael is gone, we know nothing.
No clocks can tell our time and no oceans can rush our tides.
With the abrupt absence of our treasure, though we are many, each of us is achingly alone; piercingly alone.
Only when we confess our confusion can we remember that he was a gift to us and we did have him.
He came to us from the Creator, trailing creativity in abundance.
Despite the anguish of life, he was sheethed in Mother Love and family love and survived.
And did not more than that, he thrived.
With passion and compassion. Humor and Style.
We had him.
Whether we knew who he was or did not know, he was ours and we were his.
We had him.
Beautiful, delighting our eyes. he raked his hat.
Slant over his brow and took a pose on his toes for all of us and we laughed and stomped our feet for him.
We were enchanted with his passion because he held nothing; he gave us all he had been given.
Today in Tokyo, beneath the Eifel Tower. In Ghana's Black Star Square, in Johannasburg, and Pittsburgh. In Birmingham, Alabama and Birmingham, England. We are missing Michael Jackson.
But we do know we had him.
And we are the world.

-Dr. Maya Angelou; read by Queen Latifah

it's hard to believe that it's been 5 years

because it feels like yesterday and forever ago all at the same time!

I'm so grateful for my life today... I have a brother that I didn't have 5 years ago. I can feel my heart again... it hurt too much five years ago to allow it to feel. My children now know the faces and have spent quality time with those that became so important to me. We have shared so many experiences and they finally got to see me TRULY at my best and most happy.

I'm grateful for all the ones that are vital in my daily life now that never would have been had I not made that first trip.

I'm grateful for all the ones that were the reason I wanted to make that first trip to begin with.

I'm grateful that I live under the biggest sky on the planet with the most magical sunsets I've ever seen.

I'm grateful that I sit on my back patio and hear the crickets... but can drive just 20 minutes and see the beautiful lights of downtown Dallas.

Five years ago this weekend... I came to Texas for the first time... I'm so grateful today that this is where I make my home and for the family that comes along with that.

today's the day my friends...

the world can be so cruel
well let me sing for you
this cradle song
all night long...

it's worth it... however you get your music ~ get Cradlesong by Rob Thomas!!!

i have sooooo much to say...

and yet i'm tonguetied all at the same time...

Michael Jackson's contribution to the world was CRUCIAL in forming who I am today.

I may be the ONLY PERSON on the planet that got where he was coming from when he talked about sharing the love... extending a bed to those without one... it wasn't about sex or anything perverted or anything devious... it was about recognizing that there are so many with less than nothing and being one with SO MUCH to share with them... he gave the world so much and still the world asked for more and speculated about things that our shameful society didn't understand...

For me the bottomline... he was an artist... sometimes it was a blessing... sometimes a curse beyond all curses... he was in fact as so many before me have said... MAGIC

'...everyone's taking control of me
seems that the world's got a role for me
I'm so confused will you show to me
will you be there for me
and care enough to bear me...' ~ Will You Be There... Michael Jackson

and it's really only Wednesday

sooo to catch those of you up that don't follow my mess on twitter...

I get to daycare facility on Monday to pick up Frodo (read Jake... however remember the previously blogged about forest incident ~ ok you see where I'm going then!)... they take the little tag that is supposed to ensure no one picks him up... he is where he is supposed to be safely locked away until he is released into the loving care of well... ME. I'm waiting and waiting as my son has 2 speeds ~ slow and slower!

He arrives... and is standing next to a police office ~ I joke 'You're not with him are you?' ~ officer 'Are you Jake's mom?'

YEAH... NICE right...

So Frodo was not happy with another child at daycare and knowing that inflicting bodily harm would NOT fare him well... he decided to pack up his coloring... grab his back pack and walk home.

Let me explain ~ Daycare is on east side of the major N/S interstate... the VERY NICE Officer picked my child up on the west side of the majoy N/S interstate and one exit South (closer to our home... he does in fact know how to get home from daycare!)

Yes ~ every possible emotion one can feel in the matter of 10 minutes I had... some I didn't even know you could have!!!

He is fine because as he pointed out... he stayed on the grass the entire time! In fact, he's rather puzzled as to what he did that was so wrong. Well Frodo, there are a whole slew of awful people that could have picked you up and tried to make you their own ~ 'Mom, I left daycare, I would leave them too... I'm ALWAYS going to be with you!!!'

The police officer was extremely nice and puzzled why my fearless, independent child was not afraid of walking along a major freeway but seemed terrified of a police officer ~ OOPS... The Daycare facility is now being investigated by the state ~ I did what I don't do and marched in there and said "ummmmm yeah he shouldn't have left ~ but really y'all were supposed to be watching and he walked right out the front door ~ wtf!!!" I was a bit more eloquent than that and there were a lot more tears.

Fun Times... ugh

*sigh*

here's why I love my life... after nights like last night, I'm NOT sad anymore!!


and I have half a mind to drive to Ardmore and do it all over again tonight... i'm still on a Braun high... that will wear off around 2pm and I'll be very excited to be in my bed by like 7pm...

Thanks my beautiful friends... the day of my birth used to SUK ~ not so much any more!!!!!

have I mentioned that I LOVE him...

www.huffingtonpost.com/rob-thomas/the-big-gay-chip-on-my-sh_b_208183.html

you'll have to copy and paste that link... but GO read the story it's GREATNESS!!!!

Bravo Mr. Thomas... BRAVO!!

there will be more greatness...

as I've mentioned previously, but well it bears repeating, Rob Thomas was given his gift to keep me sane!!!

'and she says oooh
I can't take no more
Her tears like diamonds on the floor
And her diamonds bring me down
Cuz I can't help her now
She’s down in it
She tried her best and now she can't win it's
Hard to see them on the ground
Her diamonds falling down...'

the new album cradlesong will be out in June... *sigh*

The Ultimate Quote of the day

got this in an email... AMEN!

"Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit."

'You've got to take the bad with the good'

...a friend sent that to me in a text yesterday ~ he was being funny... it doesn't make me laugh

I had an incredibly fabulous weekend!

The opera was more than I could have imagined and I'm ready to go to another immediately.

Ryan Bingham with the people that love and get the essence of me better than anyone ever has. Oh and it was Ryan Bingham which took a minute but has quickly moved into my favorites list! It was my first full band Bingham show... did NOT disappoint.

So I was smiling pretty big yesterday... but you know I'm pretty sure I'm entitled to that. The smile... the happy... the good. As many know... I've had my share of bad. I mean and it got worse than some even know 'cause I've kept the lowest of lows to myself. I don't think that life is going to be this ridiculously happy path of daisies and blue bonnetts forever, I'm cool with a bump in the road here and there, I'm tough as you know. But really... no I don't have to take the bad anymore.

Randomness

~ My new favorite word is bitchassness... thank you diddynation

~ I'm wondering a lot lately how's the progress on that commune in the Hill Country for all of us that don't suk to move to is coming along... I'm ready to move in NOW

~ I now live with a teenager... so far not much has changed but it's only been 3 days haha

~ once again it's solidified that I live exactly where I'm supposed to... translate that to in Texas... still keep working on that commune whoever is in charge of that plsandthanku

~ twitter is entertaining me more than I thought it would

~ I'm going to the opera on Saturday, do I HAVE to wear a dress?

~ Thai food has taken over the favorite spot from Mexican... although after typing that I now want spinach enchiladas

~ I miss Pat Green and must get to a show soon

~ I don't like the new Blue October cd... there I said it... ish

~ I DO love the new Pat Green cd... What I'm For, if you don't have it... GET IT NOW!

~ I'm ready for summer as we are all in better moods with less on our plates everday

~ We are skydiving at the end of May... if you want in let me know!!!

~ 103 days until we leave for Jackson Hole and Idaho

~ I need to go back to Virginia Beach and spend some time with my family there... I miss them too much

ok... I'll leave you with a bit from the new Blue October album... not the whole thing sux

'and I wish that only greatness would follow you around
I hope to God, you find a way to keep from down...' ~ Blue October

and a little from the new Pat because NONE of that sux...

'when there's no one around and the silence in your soul is the only sound
in the darkness that surrounds you are you hiding from the light
when you finally hit the bottom will you do what's wrong or right
you're gonna find out what your made of... in the middle of the night'

Everybody’s gotta getaway…

Seriously so I’ve ordered my passport… I don’t know where we are going… or who we is exactly… but I would like there to be very warm temperatures, beautiful blue/green water... sand… a chair… and I’ll take those bottomless beers that they had in Austin at The Parish Room as well.

I want to park myself on the beach at about 11:30 am everyday… maybe get in the pool with a swim up bar for a bit in the afternoon… I want a boy with a guitar or hell I’ll take a mariachi with a warm ocean breeze in the evenings…

I don’t need bright lights… fast paced anything… I’m more than happy to stroll from place to place… taking in whatever sights there are to be had… no one who is or acts younger than 13 is invited ~ sorry… I want a real grown up vacation.

If this sounds enticing… let’s plan it!!!

Things are good...

if you check in here ever and were wondering... well Jordan has comandeered the computer so I have very little time on an actual machine anymore, which is ok. I have the basics on the blackberry... and very little time so the time i have i'd rather call and have some 'human time'...

Idaho is 116 days away... and i'm counting down every single one of them!!!!

I will be the mom of a teen next week... those days however can CREEP by ~ although she is more stressed out about it than I am! "Mom there is so much pressure that I'm not ready for..." no worries sweet girl... I'm not going anywhere.

I wish you all a Blessed Easter... I'm off to Austin for some Blue October... Jake's first Blue show... WOOO HOOO

let's try this again...

I’ve been less than inspired to write anything really at all. Well for various reasons I suppose. I’m good right now and kind of missing this… although not sure that I have much to say. This coming weekend brings me to that place that I love the most, with the people that I love the most, I generally walk away from that situation bubbling over with so much to say about how much I love this life I’m living. For now… I’m doing pretty ok for a change and I’m kind of afraid to jinx that…